3/31 :: Attend Her Functions

functioneven if it’s not your thing, even if it’s inconvenient and difficult to schedule, attend her activities as often as you can. i know it’s difficult with all you have to do, and especially with multiple children or with a busy, working spouse, but attending her activities nurtures her self-esteem. it tells her you care enough to make those sacrifices to be there for her. try to alternate with your spouse if you can. having her father present is just as important. in an article addressing dads, lela davidson wrote,

Attending your daughter’s school functions, sporting events, and social activities will make her feel loved. It can help maintain good grades and increase her enjoyment of school. Although she may ignore you at the time, she’s secretly proud to see you watching her.

if it’s still impossible to attend, there are a few things you can do that will still send a message that you wish you were.

|| o n e ||  text her beforehand and express your regret again about not being able to make it. wish her good luck.

|| t w o ||  ask someone to take pictures of her at the event and forward to you. especially if it is a one-time event, ask someone to video record  it for  you, then ask her to sit with you while you watch it so she can tell you about her experience of it.

|| t h r e e ||  if it is a one-time event, like a performance in a concert or play, or a significant birthday, presentation of award, etc, take her shopping to buy a special outfit, shoes, makeup for the event. or take her to have her hair styled or nails done at a time when you can sit there with her and visit.

|| f o u r ||  take her out after the event for dinner or ice cream to celebrate if it’s a one-time event. if it’s an ongoing activity, like a sport, take her out to celebrate a victory. ask her how she did, what suggestions her coach made, if she was successful at something she’s been working on, etc.

|| f i v e ||  make a scrapbook or photo album to commemorate the event or season. display it openly, where guests will see it and perhaps comment on it. or give it to her as a gift {and then ask her if you can keep it on the coffee-table or other highly visible place}.

 

i have three, very active children, and one busy spouse. attending ALL of their functions ALL of the time was impossible. when we could, we’d attend as a family, bringing both parents and siblings to the event.  but usually, we tag-teamed, with my husband going to one event and me to another. when you do this, though, it’s important to switch with your spouse so that you both get to go to each child’s function at least occasionally.

have you ever found yourself struggling to attend your daughter’s function? what creative resolution did you find? 

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