Confidence Workshop :: Real Beauty, Part 1

Confidence Workshop :: Real Beauty, Part 1


Two weeks ago, we held our first confidence workshop for 9 to 11 year old girls.  I brought my 15 year old daughter,

Kayla to help me.  As I was setting up, a bunch of giggly girls were peeking in, excited to see what was going on.  Some of

the girls had attended the day before and had shared their excitement with the other girls. Boy, they were curious

about what was next on the agenda.  Real beauty was the subject {yikes} and spa activities were in store {yea}.  Fifteen girls

poured into the room and we pushed the classroom tables out of the way so we could sit in a more comfortable fashion

(on the floor in a big oval).  They were so warm hearted, open and smiling {sure made my heart happy}.  After

introducing ourselves to each other, we dug into what self esteem was.

What is self-esteem?

  • It’s part of you
  • It’s a feeling {in your head and your heart about how you like yourself}
  • It’s that little voice {your opinion of yourself}

Confidence Workshop :: Real Beauty, Part 1

What does self-esteem look like?

  • It can be seen through your body language
  • high self esteem looks confident, shoulders back, head up, smiles, stands straight. and makes eye contact
  • low self-esteem looks drawn in, shoulders rolled forward, head down, sometimes hiding themselves with crossed arms, and eyes gazed downward making little eye contact

Where does self-esteem come from?

  • comes from your experiences in life as you grow, through family, friends, and others
  • how you take care of yourself
  • the choices you make
  • goals you set

Confidence Workshop :: Real Beauty, Part 1

We talked about  real beauty and the media.  I thought it was important to expose the lies out there about what the beauty industry

says real beauty is.  Because, even at 9, they may be already molding their self-esteem by comparing themselves

with the images on commercials, billboards, and the check out aisle magazines.  I shared the video from Marla’s

previous post on PFG to expose them to the world of photo-shop. Yep, most of the girls didn’t realize that the images

they are exposed to are altered.  I shared before and after pics of their favorite celebrities.  Mouths dropped.  Body

language became more relaxed, realizing we all are imperfectly beautiful and we can each relate to that.


There is one thing that kinda disturbed me in showing this video….

….and I realized that…



Sisters, Friends, Etc….

TEACH the girls in your lives about the truths of real beauty before the beauty industry does.


Most girls had already been taught that the before pic was “ugly”


After explaining a very influential group of 9 to 11 year olds that the before pics are still beautiful…they agreed.


It was just a brief moment that really showed me how important the message of real beauty is.


We also talked about those “voices” that molds our self-esteem

{Self Talk :: Positive and Negative}.

They were really good at negative self talk and open to tell all what they didn’t like about themselves

{and I didn’t even ask!}.

So, we explored ways to retrain our brain from distorted views of our self-image

and I showed them the video Dawn had posted previously on PFG.  Again, the room got quiet, mouths dropped, and one

little girl said that it “made her feel weird”.  The “weirdness” was her eyes being opened and she could relate.


It’s so important for little girls to understand what self-esteem, self-image, and self-concept is.  To teach this

huge “part” of them that has incredible power of molding

who they are.

{Knowledge is powerful, pass it along}


Coming up :: Real Beauty, Part 2 {Spa Day Activities}

See what we did and create your own spa day

with the girls in your life.


Leave a Comment

  • patty July 8, 2013, 1:20 pm

    bobbie- so excellent! love what you girls did, and the messages you sent. can’t wait to hear more!

  • susan July 12, 2013, 1:12 am

    Wow how I wish someone like you could have talked to me at that crucial age. I was overflowing with confidence…and then one day I wasn’t anymore. I love the impact of a simple conversation.